the bible said adam AND eve so i slept with them both
one guacamole is equal to 6.0221415×10²³ guacas
I’m disgusted by my ability to get this joke
one might even call it
i hate you
(Source: ebeanezerscrooge, via palepinkandlilac)
There is this guy on the bus who calls himself Jeff. Jeff narrates the entire bus ride in third person. Today was the only day I have been on the bus with Jeff where someone has told him to shut up. Jeff sighed and then said “Jeff dramatically looks out of the window while sighing. Jeff just couldn’t understand why people had to be so rude.” The person who told him to shut up now looks like he is going to cry out of frustration.